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What I Look For in a Relationship

I don't believe you'll find everything you want in one person.


I've gone through all of my high school and college years wondering if there ever was a guy I'd come across and just KNOW. In fact, I've only known what it feels like to meet the wrong guy. Over and over and over again. Even though I've been independent all my life, there have been moments where I've wondered what it'd be like to find that certain someone. 


Over time, I learned that I was looking at it wrong. Instead of searching for that person, I decided to be that person. The one I wanted to meet. There were times when I did just give up. I'm meant to be alone. Sometimes, it just doesn't work for everyone. And then there were times when I just gave it all to God. No more searching. No more planning. No more this or that. I knew that He would provide. When the time was right.

Fast forward to now, and I've come to understand myself even more as a person. I've also learned that there are certain things I look for in a relationship. And I go about it in a way knowing this isn't so much a checklist, but a reminder that I respect myself enough to focus on what I want. I obviously know I'm not going to find someone who has every single thing I'm looking for, but I also know that in time, people can change. 

I look for someone...


1. WHO IS FAITHFUL
A man who loves the Lord is something I value. I believe it's the firm foundation for any relationship, and even if it isn't... it can lead to many difficult situations.

This is a quote I love that constantly reminds me:

Only God can give you the love you're looking for, and only God can give you the person that loves Him enough to deserve you.



2. WHO HAS A GOOD PERSONALITY / HEART
While a lot of people would focus on the appearance of a person, I always look for the heart
What's on the inside. For someone who's dealt with immature guys -- the ones who only focused on what I looked on the outside without getting to truly know me -- I realized why this is so important to me. 
Trust me, appearance is important too -- you like what you like -- but it isn't everything.



3. HOW THEY REACT TO / AND IN SITUATIONS
This is something I always look for in not just a relationship, but any form of interaction with people. I observe how they'll react in both difficult situations and easy situations. 
It's a reflection on their true character, and how this could play out in my life.



4. WHO CHALLENGES ME TO KEEP IMPROVING
I'm not always a positive and happy person. There are days (lots of it) where I feel like giving up or not wanting to talk to anyone for a long extended period of time. However, you should never settle for where you are. There's always room to improve and be the best version of yourself, and I want someone who pushes me to never give up on finding that.



5. WHO PAYS ATTENTION TO DETAILS
To me, it's the little things. I'm a very observant person. It surprises me (in a good way) when someone remembers the tiniest details of what I say or do.



6. WHO IS A FAMILY MAN
How can I expect a guy to love me when he can't even love his own family? 
That's something I stand firm on. I look for a guy who loves his family. And because he loves his family, he can love others.

I've grown up closely with my family, and that's always been something that I value. 



I'm no relationship expert, but when you love and respect yourself enough, you start to understand what it is that you want. And what it is that will help you keep moving forward.


Thanks for reading. 
What do you look for in a relationship?
I'd love to hear them!


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